Sunday, September 18, 2005

i remembered e 1st time kx tried to make me laugh was joinin both of his palms, showin me a smiley face.. he told me i'll laugh for sure.. i did nt.. bt i smiled.. tt was e 1st time i saw sumone's palm's liddat.. haha.. he told me he cut both his palms.. haha.. bt he was soo shy den.. n it became my turn nw.. haha..
i always told voon tt i kinda dislike guys' hands to be as smooth as gers.. i dunno y.. i feel tt dey're abit sissified?
n nw i finally understand y.. im afraid my hand wil be slipped down frm theirs, causin to lose a touch of secure..
i need xplainations n understandings frm various actions, nt juz to satisfy my curiousity, bt oso to reassure me wif tt sense of security..
if kx culd stay in jc tt time, i wonder how much our relationship wuld change.. much more drastically.. he wun hav time for me.. he was filled wif damn lotsa activities durin e 1st 3mths.. no excess time for me n stuffs.. n i tot im gonna hate him.. i tot tt everythin wuld be over once e term's start.. i had nth to tell, neither wanna share anythin wif him.. laughters can onli be heard wen im wif my frenz, family.. xcept him..
n back to sec 3.. be4 our 1st mth anni.. i told jm dey all dunno how long both of us can last.. mayb nt even a mth.. no feelin's involved totally..
bt nw.. i noe i'll get really upset if he's nt gonna be my best fren, shoppin khaki, one who always accompany me home, one whom i always catch movies wif, one who always listen to my complaints, whinin, wat's-goin-on-everyday-life stuffs, n so-on..
u noe e sudden taste u're gonna get wen tt sumone u're veri close to, leave u?
e sights becum so foggy tt u dun even noe where u're directin to.. u feel as though ur soul's been left behind n no matter how hard u're gonna try, u juz cant bring it back to ur body.. get upset xtremely..
n its so true tt.. no one wans tis to happen.. sum juz wanted to remain single, as dey dun wan others to hurt them.. dey rather let loneliness kill them..
wen everythin's becumin like part of ur mood, n u cant seem to get tiredness outta it.. wen u can get damn high abt sum stuffs, n get damn emotional over sum matters.. ttz human.. dey hav feelings all over, be it their mind or soul, n dey xpresses it out in different ways.. like how ur face changes wen u tryin hard to shit tt shit outta ur ass like as if u're constipatin..
human's life nva gonna be perfect..
n im wonderin watz gonna happen if i step into e society to work next time..
im stil yearnin to hav sumone to send me for work, pickin me up after work to go for dinners n send me back home.. (;


im headin off for my chips!
two days of turned-off my mind makin me feelin as if exams over.. haha..
dreamin lah wl..
2wks.. n u're gonna be celebratin.. yeaa q;
chloe feels 8:08 PM